Introduction.

            Hello everyone! I’m back to sitting on my couch again (where I do all of my writing) instead of laying in bed all day doing nothing. I decided I would do my (very late) introduction about myself and my blog to get things off to an official start-woo hoo! First things first, my name is Shelby Slaughter and I am currently attending Arizona State University studying Journalism & Mass Communications with a minor in Sociology. When I am not at school or at work you can find me by the food, whether I’m at a party, wedding, or at my house in my very own kitchen that sure is your best bet!

I think I really found myself with a little help from an organization that I like to call AASC (Arizona Association of Student Councils) if you follow me on any social media sites, you’ve seen that abbreviation before so this is just to bring everyone up to speed. AASC came into my life my sophomore year of high school when I joined student council at my high school in Apache Junction, Arizona. Throughout sophomore year I did the typical STUCO kid thing; I planned the dances, I laughed way too much on the live announcements, I planned blood drives, and I put my everything into it. It wasn’t until that summer that I went to my very first AASC camp, that’s where it all changed for me.

While I won’t give away the secrets of my home away from home, I will say this: This camp brought so many new insights to my life, that I didn’t even think were possible. Ever since stepping foot on the dirt-paved walkway it’s been a learning experience. I’ve learned acceptance and I don’t just mean accepting others without judging them, I mean accepting others to the fullest of my ability without any hesitation. I’ve learned what it truly takes to be an amazing leader and how you can teach people with your actions to be great leaders as well. And lastly, I’ve learned how to trust the process and sometimes that’s a really really hard thing to do, but I’ve learned to accept that and live my life knowing that it’s all apart of the plan.

Another huge part of my life is a magical moment that happened almost two years ago. I was in that weird transition stage from high school graduate to freshmen in college and I had no idea what I was doing in life, you’ve been there too right? I had just started my new job at Chase Bank when someone dropped dead in front of me. Yeah, I said it correctly; the man had a heart attack and died right then and there. Now, I don’t know about you but I do a lot of dumb things without thinking such as talking when I shouldn’t and impulse buys. But this was the one thing in my life I did without thinking that I will never forget: I started CPR. I did this until the paramedics arrived and took him away. Now, almost two years later that man is still alive and living with his family. Why this man had chosen to come to a random branch to pull out money at an ATM, I will have no idea. But I do know that there was someone watching out for him that day, and someone watching out for me. I learned from that one simple experience that day that life will happen whether you’re ready or not. Sometimes it takes a little push or even your life to be put on the line to make you realize that it’s time to start living and time to stop watching. Now, let’s fast forward to some other things:

·       I enjoy reading Nicholas Sparks novels, even though I can predict the ending in every single one of his books.

·       I’m utterly obsessed with anything “The Hunger Games,” and “Divergent.”

·       I hate camping and nature walks and anywhere else that a bug is likely to crawl on me.

·       I just recently got not one-but two speeding tickets. It’s not really something I’m proud of but they were one day apart and I think that stands for something.

·       With that being said, I drive a Prius. So naturally all of my friends are jealous because she (yes, my car is a girl) goes really fast.

·       I like taking risks. Not in the real world like jumping out of a plane or off a bridge or something. I’m talking about the career world; I like putting myself out there to meet new people.

·       I was in a sorority once, but I dropped out because I like meeting new people on my own.

·       One time I went to a military ball and broke a $400.00 vase.

Now, I’m a junior in college and I am starting to see that light at the end of the tunnel to something they call the “real world.” I’m really scared and anxious to see what the world has in store for me. But don’t worry, I’ll keep you all in the loop with this new fun blog of mine!

XOXO,

Gossip Girl

Whoops, I forgot I’m not that cool yet.

Happy Birthday Gabbi!

Sending Birthday Wishes Up to Heaven Today!

Today is my sweet Gabbi’s birthday and since she is up in heaven having her birthday party with other puppies, I thought I would give her a special shout-out from down here.

For those of you who don’t know, I lost my precious Yorkie to cancer about three weeks back. It’s been hard coming to terms with it, but I know God is up there taking good care of her.
I’ve realized it’s really hard losing something that you wanted everyday to protect, but in the end there was a bigger plan for my Gabbi. With that being said today, I am hoping that Gabbi has lots of her dollar store Pizza Treats and warm snuggles surrounded by her all day.

Because Gabbi isn't here with me to make new memories, I decided to share some old ones.

The day after I brought her home and got her groomed. 

Such a little cutie.

Gabbi's first trip to the vet, she was a bit nervous. 

 She loved her car rides, and that blanket.

 I took her to the gym at my old apartment once, 

Gabbi jumped right up and watched me.

And my heart melted every time she did this. 

Love you so much Gabbi, can't wait until I see you again.

"If dogs don't go up to heaven, then I want to go where they go."

A Friendly Reminder

At 11:43AM I received a text and it said:

Hi Shelby

Friendly reminder to forget the past and remember the lesson, okay? You’re so smart and kind and caring and BEAUTIFUL inside and out, and you can’t let life get you down. Don’t settle with mediocre. Don’t settle with conditional love.

I hope you have a great day.

The sad part is I know exactly what prompted this text this morning, however; the good thing is I’m happy that there was someone looking out for me to stop me in my tracks. In life, we as humans find comfort. We find comfort in many different things that help keep us who we are and whether that be a hobby, a pet, or a person we all have something. This strange trait is something that just happens so fast and naturally that we don’t even realize the attachment that we have to that thing/certain someone until it’s completely stripped away from us.

For me, I had all three. In high school, I had adopted a love for Student Council and that to me was the most important thing in my life during that time. I’m so thankful for having Student Council and all of the people that it has brought into my life, because it has given me some of the most amazing opportunities and the most lasting friendships. The second was my precious puppy Gabbi, who I just lost two weeks ago, that puppy was one of the most incredible things to ever prance her way into my life. Gabbi became the single most important thing in my life because she depended on me and in a way I depended on her without even knowing it. Gabbi was the most sweetest dog, that I couldn’t imagine in a thousand years seeing her being taken away from me so fast, she had so much love to give me every single day and my friends and family fell in love with her as well. I found comfort in Gabbi because she was always there next to me and giving me her kisses. Only when she passed away from cancer unexpectedly did I have that comfort ripped away from me leaving with the most empty feeling I have ever felt in my whole entire life. Lastly, I found comfort in a boy. Around the same time I lost my dog I also let go of someone who held a very special part of my heart. Looking back at it rationally I find myself asking why I held onto to someone who never wanted my comfort in the first place. To this day, I don’t even think that he realizes that I am his second option because he wants to have us both. That for me is something I have a lot of trouble making sense of. Being the second option, it’s something no girl wants to hear or come to terms with herself especially when you did everything in the realm of possibility to make things work for you both. Stepping out of my comfort zone, and from him was a walk that I still find impossible.

            Now you want to know the strange thing? Even after knowing the outcome of a situation that we have found comfort in, we always find ourselves going back. I have never really understood why it is so hard for people to let go of something. It’s like we just retrace our steps backwards hoping that for whatever reason, we will have a different outcome. That’s exactly what I have been doing, retracing my footsteps. We invest so much of our time and love into other things that sometimes we forget to invest time in ourselves. That’s what I realized this morning thanks to a special friend. Find comfort in yourself and knowing that one day you will make something beautiful out of your life. Find comfort in the fact that your beloved puppy and your family members are smiling down upon you in heaven and they are so amazed by the incredible things that you are doing every single day. And lastly, find comforting in realizing that some people out there are in need of more help than you can give them. You can’t begin to help someone until you know how to help yourself, and that’s where I have been falling short these past couple of days.

            Thank you to the special woman who probably thought the text was so simple that I would ignore it. Please know that it made a huge impact on my day and know that I did a complete game-changer. I love you, and you are stronger than you know too.

Hats off to 2014!

It's official! Congrats to all of the graduates of 2014!

Feels like only yesterday that I was walking across the stage grabbing my own diploma.

News Flash Shelby, two years have gone by in the blink of an eye!

Last night I got the opportunity along with my best friends and family to watch my baby brother walk across the stage and receive his diploma.

I was such a proud big sister.

Chance has grown into such a fine young man,

and while he still has some (a lot!) of growing up to do I know that life will take him to great places.

Class of 2014, you did it! Now go out and make this world an amazing place.

The future is what you make it, and now it is all in your hands.

Here is a look at my evening, I'll hold it close to my heart forever.

Before the big moment! After much debate between him and Nicole, Chance eventually traded out that awful tie-dye shirt.

My two favorite people. My best friend, Nicole, and my baby brother. 

Our pre-graduation selfie with the family!

 Before the big moment! So glad I still get to make memories with this girl even after walking the field.

Dear John.

 Dear John,

            You taught me a very important lesson this past weekend. One I feel the need to share with the world. Ever since I have known you, you’ve always had nothing but honest words to bring to the table. You’ve also always been one of the people that, no matter what crazy situation I have gotten myself into, you will tell me how it is. I’ve always admired your honesty in that sense and to be honest myself, it keeps me grounded. I value your friendship more than you will ever know.

            As you know, I have a natural talent for fishing. All day Sunday I tried my hardest to catch a fish so I could provide for camp and you stayed by my side all day. Although you had no confidence in my natural ability to cast a reel, you kept your patience with me every time I caught a stick and made you take it off. When I finally gave up the first time you told me, “Shelby, how do you know your next cast won’t be the cast that makes the catch?” I didn’t care, in all honesty. I knew I wasn’t going to catch a fish. At that moment I walked away you and yelled my name saying you caught a fish, and I realized just how wrong I was. But that wasn’t enough for me to learn by lesson, because less than twenty minutes later I was fed up with fishing again and stomped away handing you my fishing pole. As I am walking away I literally couldn’t believe my eyes when I see you fall in the water reeling in another fish. Thinking about it now still has me in shock.

            You taught me a very important lesson that day without even realizing it. I know that sometimes in life you forget the important things; However, God places certain people in your life to teach you something and you were the one he chose on Sunday. That afternoon I learned that no matter how hard something is in life, whether it be trout fishing, climbing a mountain, getting an internship, applying for grad school, or anything else hard in life you should never give up. Giving up is showing weakness, and that’s what I let show all day on Sunday. Thank you for teaching me that no matter how hard life can be, if you stick with it you’ll have the end results that you wanted. I’m so thankful to have you in my life as a friend, and a brutally honest mentor.

Sincerely,

Shelby

Pathways.

            The last time I had a sit down big-sister talk was back in December, and she said to me, “Life is hard, life is really really hard, but it is such a beautiful thing that teaches you so many lessons.” My sister has always been the one to leave me with some of the best advice I have ever received. It’s really true, she has taught me that no matter what life hands you, it’s all-apart of a bigger picture that we are creating every day. This is something that I have thought about an awful lot during the past few months. The words have stayed with me because the path that I have been on will no doubt lead me to many more challenges that I need to conquer myself.

            I’m not just talking about my recent battles and losing my dog and my life ambitions. The hard stuff, yeah, but I am talking about something much bigger and the challenges that come with living in a way that I can serve as a role model to others. To me, that is extremely important and all I want to do. Yet, at my age and the places that I have been and the people that I know, I know how hard it is to get caught up in a different lifestyle than what I originally wanted to live. This past year was a learning experience for me, and I realized how off track I got. I lost sight of the bigger picture and what I ultimately wanted to accomplish for myself, and for others. I’ve been praying a lot lately, and I know that God is leading me back on this path that I was heading full speed for. But you know what, I think that was all God’s plan in the first place. Sometimes you need to get off track and lose yourself for a little while so that you can find yourself. And if you end up going back to the same dream, then you know you’re destined for that.
            A lot of the time I look at other people and I find myself so jealous because their lives seem so much easier and less complicated. Jealousy is a really dangerous thing. It is something that can control our minds so easily and it’s something that I think a lot of us will never get past. For me personally, I know I am constantly comparing myself to the girl with the beautiful body or my old Student Council roommate who is a dancer, even my best friends. We all do it, whether we admit it now or later. I’m not saying any path that we choose will be easy, I’m just saying that it will be worth it. The bad things that we encounter everyday are what make the better times so much more worth it. And in the end, you get the ultimate reward. A beautiful life that you create all on your own. Whether you fill that life with lies and troubles or with joy, love, and friendship. It’s your life and your pathway.

A Little Time For Reflection.

The Why.

            After my much-needed weekend to reflect on the unexpected turn my life took, I decided it’s time to share a story. A story that I know I will live past, and a story that I hope will help other people who read this. Although I won’t say too much however; I just think it’s important for you to know what happened. I remember it like it was yesterday, I had just walked into my local LA Fitness and I remember my heart began fluttering and the fluttering hasn’t stopped to this day. If you guessed it’s because I met a boy, you are absolutely correct. And over the course of the year we fell in love and I thought my life was going exactly the way that it should. But then fate started stepping in a little more each and every day, and every day I would uncover a new lie from this person whom I trusted so much. Each day I would live past the lies and we would begin again. But each day it grew harder for me to believe who I was falling in love with, and all the while I was trying so hard to believe in someone that I stopped believing in myself. All I will say about what came after was domestic violence, continuously.  That is something only my close friends and family will ever know but I think it’s important that you all know too. And this is why: Over the past year I was verbally and physically abused, and when you’re in that situation you don’t really think how you can get out of it, you think of how you can make that person better because all you want to do is love them and live that fairy-tale life. And if you’re reading this, and you’re in this current situation please know it’s not worth it and that it’s not you. You need to get out and know that God has a plan for you, and this is just a stepping-stone to where you are going to go in life. Well that’s not what my life has been. My life for the past year was a learning experience, and that’s all I can really say. This past year taught me that only you can have the courage to get out of something that is bad for you. Your friends and your family can all tell you that what you’re doing is wrong, but you in the end are the one that has to do the moving on and that’s what makes everything so difficult. I can truly thank his grandma for her beautiful advice and her willingness to always talk to me and comfort me. She is a remarkable woman, and I hope that person realizes that as much as I do. But I will tell you this, I believe in miracles. I still believe in that other person and the love that I have for him. If you can take anything out of reading this blog, take this with you: You can only believe in someone for so long, until they give you nothing to believe in anymore. That’s the bottom line, and that’s where I am at, the bottom.

The Destination.

            This past weekend I needed something different. I needed to see something new, something that wasn’t what I was use to for the past year. I had just walked away from a relationship that didn’t matter an ounce to the other person, but mattered everything to me and on top of that I lost my puppy. I needed to get away and know that I can recover. So, I packed my bags on Thursday night and I was in New York the next day. New York, stole my heart, along with a certain someone I met while there. The city itself is beautiful and I met so many inspiring people that made me realize that this past year was nothing, and I can build myself to be so much better and stronger. The best part for me was what was said before I left for New York. Remember that boyfriend I loved so much? I quote him, “You will never find love again Shelby, you’re not worth it. And I will make sure you never see New York.” And when I landed in New York and walked into the apartment that I was staying at I knew that I had done everything right. I’m beyond the person who tried to manipulate and lie and change me for the past year and I am back to being Shelby. I am back to changing the world, and I am back to make a difference.

My first time ever being in New York, I was so happy.

Ferry Ride to Staten Island was a dream.

Denim on Denim on Denim in Times Square.

Not sure if I left my heart with the city 

or with this guy.

Or maybe my heart was left with this yummy 

Buffalo Chicken Mac and cheese.

Grand Central Station, I have no words.

And then just like that I hauled my first cab

and I was gone.